i could use a good laugh
1. Know that you are still blooming, and this is okay.
2. Write handwritten love notes to the parts of yourself you hate.
3. Find the comfort in holding your own hand.
4. Remember, even clouds cry sometimes.
5. Date yourself. Get to know yourself again.
6. Learn how to be alone without feeling lonely.
7. Do something that scares you every day, no matter how small. Watch your life change.
8. Stop wishing for a vacation and make your life into something you don’t wish to escape from.
9. Recognize that the best artists color outside the lines. You have the same freedom in your life. Break conventions.
10. Go to the florist on the corner and buy yourself some flowers. Spoil yourself. You deserve it.
11. Throw out your premeditated list of qualities for your perfect mate. That special person is not a recipe or equation. Humans are more than that.
12. Share your testimony. Our story is meant to be heard. Find your voice.
13. Wish to be more like rain than snow. Snow is frigid and hardens. Rain is vulnerable and soft.
14. Look at your veins. They are roots, and your limbs are branches. Your body is a strong tree. Don’t you dare cut it down.
15. Strive to have the same humility as the sun. It shines brilliantly every day without needing anyone to notice.
16. Flip through old photos and reminisce about the past, but do not live there. Nothing new happens there.
17. Dust off the fingerprints of any past lover left on your skin. You belong only to yourself.
18. Become the person you’d like to fall in love with.
19. Loving yourself again will be like putting on eyeglasses. The blur will fade and you will see yourself for what you truly are: beautiful."
All of the photos were taken at Edith Wharton’s summer home, The Mount, and all of the characters in the photos are supposed to be Edith and contemporaries who were part of her “circle”. I put in the original captions from the Vogue shoot*. I also love that these real people are portrayed by artists, writers, actors, and models, including Junot Diaz, Jonathan Safran Foer, and Elijah Wood.
I wish that they’d make a movie based on an Edith Wharton book where the costumes looked like these—based on the period dress, but not perfectly authentic so as to allow some contemporary influence (omg wait though, I just found this photo of Edith where she’s wearing that dress with the crazy stripes!!!). It’d be awesome if the music was modern too… think Moulin Rouge, or what The Great Gatsby movie could’ve been. Ugh it’d be so good!!!
If you’re a writer and haven’t read Edith Wharton yet, seriously drop what you’re doing and pick up House of Mirth or The Age of Innocence or even just a collection of her shorts stories (unless you want every piece of contemporary literature you read to seem like total garbage, because that’s what her writing will do to you). Her use of language is impeccable; every single sentence is absolutely perfect. I’m reading The Custom of the Country right now (I’m making my way through her entire collected works; I’m on C and literally every story is just home run amazing) and I have to imagine that she just sat down and these stories poured forth from her, because the idea of having to go back and edit these complex plots and interactions and crazy scaffolding of inter-character relationships and structure seems so daunting that I can’t even imagine that process would be possible. And her writing is so perfect that it does seem like she had these entire stories in her head from start to finish when she sat down to write them.
I guess you could say you’d like Edith Wharton if you like Jane Austen, Kate Chopin, or Virginia Woolf, because so much of the action happens inside of the characters’ heads, but I think she blows those women out of the water. Her subject matter is also somewhat unique because she was part of the high society of New York City around the turn of the century (think of the glitz and glamour of Gatsby, but just a little bit earlier) and was willing to write about all of the crazy social rules that people abided by at that time. I love reading about what Manhattan was like at that time… in one story there’s a young unmarried woman who very scandalously lives alone in “that artist’s neighborhood full of Bohemians”, the East Village, which is where I live. Wharton could write about lower class people too—her most famous book about “peasants” is Ethan Frome. Most of her books are love stories or involve strong women revolting against the institution of marriage—Wharton’s time in history was a strange one, as women were still married off as part of what was basically a business deal, but people also were starting to get divorces. But a lot of her social commentary—on not just relationships, but wealthy, celebrity, the family unit, etc.—are still really relevant today, which makes the books so timeless (people sometimes say that Gossip Girl draws from Edith Wharton’s books, although Gossip Girl makes all of these interpersonal relationship problems seem super trite, whereas Wharton masterfully makes them seem as serious to the reader as they are to her characters.) But her books are full of lots and lots of scandal, and equally as many badass heroines.
Okay, that’s the end of my gushing, but seriously, just reading her will make you a better writer, I swear.
*What they didn’t note about the Wharton/James/Fullterton friendship in the captions was that Henry James was also in love with Fullerton, so the 3 of them may or may not have had some kind of ménage à trois (it seems to have been, at the very least, an intellectual one). If you find you like Wharton, you’ll like James too, as his work influenced hers and vise versa. James’ The Turn of the Screw is seriously the scariest book I’ve ever read.
How to talk to your daughter about her body, step one: don’t talk to your daughter about her body, except to teach her how it works.
Don’t say anything if she’s lost weight. Don’t say anything if she’s gained weight.
If you think your daughter’s body looks amazing, don’t say that. Here are some things you can say instead:
“You look so healthy!” is a great one.
Or how about, “you’re looking so strong.”
“I can see how happy you are – you’re glowing.”
Better yet, compliment her on something that has nothing to do with her body.
Don’t comment on other women’s bodies either. Nope. Not a single comment, not a nice one or a mean one.
Teach her about kindness towards others, but also kindness towards yourself.
Don’t you dare talk about how much you hate your body in front of your daughter, or talk about your new diet. In fact, don’t go on a diet in front of your daughter. Buy healthy food. Cook healthy meals. But don’t say “I’m not eating carbs right now.” Your daughter should never think that carbs are evil, because shame over what you eat only leads to shame about yourself.
Encourage your daughter to run because it makes her feel less stressed. Encourage your daughter to climb mountains because there is nowhere better to explore your spirituality than the peak of the universe. Encourage your daughter to surf, or rock climb, or mountain bike because it scares her and that’s a good thing sometimes.
Help your daughter love soccer or rowing or hockey because sports make her a better leader and a more confident woman. Explain that no matter how old you get, you’ll never stop needing good teamwork. Never make her play a sport she isn’t absolutely in love with.
Prove to your daughter that women don’t need men to move their furniture.
Teach your daughter how to cook kale.
Teach your daughter how to bake chocolate cake made with six sticks of butter.
Pass on your own mom’s recipe for Christmas morning coffee cake. Pass on your love of being outside.
Maybe you and your daughter both have thick thighs or wide ribcages. It’s easy to hate these non-size zero body parts. Don’t. Tell your daughter that with her legs she can run a marathon if she wants to, and her ribcage is nothing but a carrying case for strong lungs. She can scream and she can sing and she can lift up the world, if she wants.
Remind your daughter that the best thing she can do with her body is to use it to mobilize her beautiful soul."
The EXACT opposite of the way my mother treats me about my body.
my major face holes are leaking
That moment in your childhood when you realize that Diagon Alley is just the word diagonally….
And the Mirror of Erised is just the word desire backwards.
Didn’t even realize. Does that mean Knockturn Alley is nocturnally (dark/night)?
Yes, and Grimmauld Place is a play on grim old place.
And Dumbledore is just a dumb old door